I signed up for a sprint triathlon.
Half a mile swim, 10 mile bike ride, 5k. Like all in the same day.
Two of my lady friends are doing it and I am very susceptible to peer pressure after three boulevardiers.
And after waking up on Saturday and thinking “WTF did I just do,” I signed up for swimming lessons.
Like I’m a small child.
But I knew that if I was going to actually do this, I was going to have to commit quickly. And learn to swim farther than, say, to the swim-up bar for another mango marg.
Oh and also I need a bike.
And somehow, despite my lack of swimming abilities or a mode of cycling transportation, I think I can do this. And I’m going to do this. And it may not be pretty, but I’m going to finish.
It’s annual cleanse time, friends! Goodbye gluten and sugar and caffeine and dairy and alcohol…
So while I’m not enjoying my favorite things (wine, cheese, crusty bread, nachos), I am instead working at becoming the picture of health. Or something.
Regardless, it’s possible to be healthy and still eat delicious food. Evidence: the menu this week:
Grilled cedar plank salmon with grilled asparagus
Southwestern Mahi Mahi salad with Mexican Green Goddess dressing
Poached cod with tomato and saffron
Shrimp lettuce wraps (with some modifications)
Veggie frittata with a mixed greens salad
Spicy Thai shrimp soup (without the rice)
Pan-seared scallops and shrimp salad
Enjoy a glass of wine for me tonight and I’ll live vicariously through you!
(Also pray for me because I’m going to happy hour with my friends where I will watch them enjoy all of the things while I drink water.)
The before picture makes me cringe. But I lost 30 pounds. So that was exciting (let’s not talk about what I’ve gained back in the past two months because there is not a cheese plate or popcorn tin or cookie tray on this earth that I’ve been able to resist). My friends threw me a bridal shower. I made the world’s largest souffle.
Brian threw me an 80’s birthday party. Where the main course was nachos. IT WAS PERFECT. Work took me to Santa Barbara and New York. There was a ton of wedding prep. All of my dreams came true when we saw Fleetwood Mac in concert.
A freak snowstorm meant that our May 4th backyard Kansas wedding could no longer be in a backyard or in Kansas. So Brian and I had to get legally married in a parking lot just past the state line because our marriage license was for Kansas and our new wedding venue was in Missouri. But then we had the most perfect wedding ever ever ever ever. And I married the love of my life all over again. And then we had an awesome honeymoon. A hot second later, I was in NY again. I ate. Visited friends. Worked. And then flew to Canada.
Navigated downtown Toronto for a conference. Bought Canadian wine (really good, you guys!). Got stuck in the airport for like 12 hours and had a small breakdown. Kicked off pool season. Threw a sangria and tapas party. Made shrimp dumplings. Continued living the dream.
Our house was featured in a local magazine. Which was kind of amazing. Spent the 4th with family. My sister moved to the Midwest and finally I was no longer alone out here. New Kids on the Block rocked my world. We went to the lake for a wonderful weekend with our crazy friends.
Visited Southwest Florida for the first of many trips. Ate a sushi boat, listened to the blues, and attended my bro-in-law’s white coat ceremony in St. Louis. Saw Bruno Mars. Adopted The Power Lip. And went to Kennebunkport, Maine for a fantastic getaway with my love.
Ate the best lobster roll in my life in Portland, Maine. And four others. In four days. It’s fine. Spent an exceptionally crazy week in Florida. Reunited with my family in Sacramento to spend time with my grandparents. AND THEN I WENT BACK TO FLORIDA. YEP. Why haven’t I reached Southwest A-List status?!
My very favorite girl in the whole world lost her left eye in a pretty traumatic series of events. She’s doing just fine. So we dressed her up as a pirate for Halloween (and her brother as a parrot). I went to my first Chiefs game. I drank a boot full of IPA. Which seemed like a good idea at the time. (It was not.) My first trip to Charleston was much too short.
I spent nine days in Chicago for the most exciting work project of my career. Nine days. Living in a condo with one toilet. And three co-workers. I finally found the perfect rug and decorated the foyer in our house. And then we flew to California for another sister’s wedding. And then we drove up the coast and went wine tasting in Los Olivos and Paso Robles. We stayed in Big Sur and then ended up at my dad’s house in Santa Cruz for Thanksgiving and it was WONDERFUL.
The holiday season arrived. I threw a baby shower. The office holiday party was less of a disaster than usual, though we did have a special performance from Al Lotta. We had our annual holiday dinner party with friends. I made too much food and agonized about the decor, per usual. We visited family in St. Louis and spent Christmas in Texas. I kept an eye out for Tim Riggins. He never showed up. And then somehow, we ended the year by buying ourselves new cars. Tomorrow night is our New Year’s Eve dinner with friends.
And then… a new year. A new set of adventures. Maybe I’ll finally grow up in 2014. But probably not.
May 2014 be as wonderful to all of you as 2013 was to me.