"I recently had a falling out with a boy with whom I’d had an on again off again fling with for two years when I saw him leaving the bar we were at with a forty-year old. I immediately drunk texted him the following: “I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.” This led to the coining of the term “dife,” which is now used when you don’t quite want someone to die, but you really wouldn’t feel bad if the contracted syphilis and the flu simultaneously."
— A reader submission to Julia Allison, who is posting a a series of stories about text messages. Go read them. They’re hilarious.
